"Reader's circle" -- Page 1 of cover.

This work was originally published in hardcover in slightly different form by Villard Books in 2003.

Includes a preview of Firoozeh Dumas' new book Laughing without an accent (pages [215]-227)

Leffingwell Elementary School -- Hot dogs and wild geese -- In the gutter -- Save me, Mickey -- Swoosh-swoosh -- With a little help from my friends -- Bernice -- A dozen key chains -- You can call me Al -- Of mosquitoes and men -- The "F word" -- Waterloo -- America, land of the free -- The Ham amendment -- Treasure Island -- It's all relatives -- Me and Bob Hope -- I ran and I ran and I ran -- I-raynians need not apply -- Girls just wanna have funds -- Joyeuse Noëlle -- The wedding -- I feel the earth move under my feet -- A nose by any other name -- Judges paid off -- If I were a rich man -- Afterword : Kazem and Nazireh Jazayeri.